• Han Butler

24 Things Women Need To Stop Apologising For

Updated: Sep 17, 2019


Photo by Elle Hughes

Ladies - it's time to stop apologising for doing you! In this male-dominated society, we're expected to conform to certain rules and regulations. What happens when we don't act accordingly? We're expected to apologise - and we do. Well fuck that! This isn't the 1800s and I refuse to be oppressed by misogynistic assholes. If you're ready to be an unapologetic, powerful woman, then keep reading!


24 THINGS WOMEN NEED TO STOP APOLOGISING FOR


Not always having your shit together...


We all have those moments where we have no clue what we're doing today, next week or in life. We're all equally confused and overwhelmed by life, so don't apologise for throwing plans out the window and opting to wing it instead.


Making the "wrong" decision...


Never apologise for making a life decision that others deem "wrong". Everyone is entitled to deciding their own fate and making their own mistakes. Don't let anybody make you feel guilty for trusting your gut when making a decision. At the end of the day, it's your life not theirs.


Asking questions...


"Sorry, if you don't mind me asking..." How many times do you start your question of like that? I know I do it quite a bit. We need to stop. Just ask your question; without fear, and unapologetically.


Speaking your mind...


Would a man hesitate or apologise when he has something to say? No. So neither should we. Women have shit to say too, and we have every right to say it.


Swearing...


Men swearing is the norm. Women swearing turns heads. Is "fuck you" not lady-like? Are we offending you? Well, too bad.


Being intelligent...


NEVER apologise for being the smartest one in the room.


Being independent...


"I work hard. I pay my bills. I maintain myself. I'm independent. When you see me know that's all me. I'm not kept. I do the keeping."


It is so important that you learn how to build a life for yourself - separate from your partner. Sometimes, the independent life you live may intimidate people and they'll try to undermine you, but live it anyway.


Being successful...


Your success is measured by you, and you alone. Never apologise to those who try to undervalue your successes, because when it comes down to it, their opinions don't cut you a check.


Being confident...


A woman who is confident doesn't require validation from anyone - and some insecure people do not like that, but that's not your problem. So never let anybody make you feel guilty for loving yourself.


Your appearance...


We constantly find ourselves apologising for not wearing make-up, for not painting our nails or for having a bad hair day etc. And that has got to stop. How we look shouldn't offend anyone, so therefore, no apologies necessary. But if someone does get offended by chipped nail varnish, tell them to get a life!


Designing our own bodies...


"Tattoos ruin your body and they're not attractive" is something that I have been told MANY times. Now I'm only going to say this once so listen up - as hard as it is for some people to believe, any tattoos, piercings, hair colouring's or surgery we get is for us, not you. No woman should have to apologise for caring more about their own self love than other people's unwanted opinions.


Morning imperfections...


Bed head, mouth open, morning breath, drool - that's the morning reality. Men need to get it out of their heads that we wake up looking like sleeping beauty, because we're not apologising; I mean, you're not prince charming first thing of a morning yourselves.


Lack of femininity...


BREAKING NEWS - women burp, fart, don't always cross their legs when they sit down and not all of them like wearing pretty dresses and heels.


In all seriousness, women should not have to apologise for not meeting the standards of societies idea of femininity.


Being too sexy or not sexy enough...


We can never seem to win in the eyes of some men. They all have a different image of what sexy is, so don't apologise for not meeting their impossible standards. You be as sexy as you want to be, just do you!


Not wanting to be sexually harassed...


Just because a woman walks through a public space, that does not mean that her body is a public space. Women should never, under any circumstances, have to apologise for wearing what they want to wear. Is it really too much to ask for women's safety to be more important than men's penis-ruled feelings? Is it too much to ask to not be whistled at like we're dogs? Is it too much to ask to be respected?


Number of sexual partners...


I can't believe this is something we still feel we have to apologise for. Who the fuck cares whether you've had 1 sexual partner or 200? Men don't get judged for their number.


Loving sex...


Even in 2019, for some unknown reason, it's still socially unacceptable for women to talk openly about sex and admit that we love it just as much as men do.


Well, you talk about it all you want babe!


Exploring your sexuality...


*No slut-shaming allowed here*


Women should definitely not be made to feel as though they have to apologise for exploring their sexuality. Quite frankly, it isn't anyone's business who you choose to have sex with, with however many people, or how often. Explore the wonders of your sexuality and have fun hun!


Not wanting children...


This may come as a shock to some people but it is ok not to want children. Having children is a personal choice, so don't let anybody tell you any differently. You may be a woman, but you're not put on this earth purely to carry children. Your body belongs to you and you alone. #ProChoice


Your parenting decisions...


I'm not a parent and even I get pissed off when people think they can tell parents "you're doing it wrong". Don't apologise because you don't dote on your kids like Susie or because you don't scream at them every 10 minutes like Karen. Just do what you think is right. They're your kids, no one else's.


Being fussy...


"Ugh you're so fussy!" Erm yeah, and?


Whether it's with food, love, your career or your friends - being fussy is a good thing, because it means you know what you want and you're not going to accept anything less.


Being overly emotional...


If you're like me, then every time you've been crying, been frustrated or scared - you've turned to whoever you're with and you have apologised for being in the state you're in. It seems to be a natural, automatic response for us but it has to stop! Nobody, man or woman, should apologise for being emotional and being vulnerable. You're human, it happens to all of us.


Talking about periods...


Why do most men find it so bloody difficult to talk about periods? Or even utter the word. We don't like them either lads but we don't have much option in the matter. They pay us a visit every month and if you've got women in your life, then you should probably grow a vagina and get used to talking about it!


Being a woman...


You're a beautiful, strong, confident, independent woman. Never let someone tell you that you can't have or do something because you're female. Stay proud of being the fierce babe that you are!


So ladies, let's make a pact - no more unnecessary apologies! Pinky swear?


Love, Han


xo



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