• Han Butler

Bloggers Uncensored: with Lady Like Lavender

Photo by Negative Space

Welcome to this weeks Bloggers Uncensored! This is my latest and favourite blog series that I've created. This series is an opportunity to ready your favourite bloggers' honest and uncensored opinions on real life topics. This weeks blogger is Lady Like Lavender.

Tell us a little about yourself.

My name is Chiara, I'm 22 years old and I'm from New York. I love finding treasures at thrift stores and discovering new places to eat. I spend most of my days with my boyfriend, Lucas, my mom or my cats.

Why do you write?

I write mostly about classy things. My motto is "Keeping Classy in Style" and I try to write posts with that in mind including fashion, travel, relationships and photography.

Why did you start blogging?

I started blogging because I had broken up with my ex boyfriend and it wasn't until I had met my current boyfriend that he made me understand exactly how badly my ex boyfriend treated me after telling him my story. I really didn't want other girls to fall into the same trap that I fell into with my ex, so I started the blog so that I could be able to spread awareness to more women. I haven't talked about it though on my blog because my mom follows me and I don't think I'm ready for her to know just yet hahaha how funny.

What do you love about the blogging world/community?

I love the blogging community because we always support each other. Whether it's a simple retweet of a post or a kind comment on a photo, there's something special in finding little friendships with people who you've never met.

What do you hate about the blogging world/community?

I don't hate anything about the blogging community I think, though, that bloggers have a lot of pressure when it comes to doing everything. Like being on all the social media platforms, deciding to start vlogging to get more followers/views, posting everyday on social media or making sure our feed looks perfect. I think we all need to relax and not get peer pressured into doing everything. Do what makes you comfortable and happy. It shouldn't be overwhelming it should be fun!

In your opinion, who are the most underrated bloggers?

I think any "small" blogger is underrated. So many people worship these bloggers with huge followings and perfect photos. The people who deserve the attention are the bloggers who don't make a living from it, the bloggers who work two jobs, have children and still make it work. Not the ones who have a whole team behind them making sure they're successful.

What are some hard truths you have learnt about life?

A hard truth I've learnt about life is that there are a lot of people out there that don't care about your well being. Whether it be from a guy, a friend or even a family member. If you feel uncomfortable, unhappy or upset when you're around someone you do not have to be around that person. Surround yourself with people who love you and care about you because there's no reason to put yourself in a situation that makes you upset.

What does freedom mean to you?

To me freedom means doing what you want without having someone telling that you can't. I'm Italian and I go to Italy a couple times a year and I can confidently say that I am so happy I live in America. I don't think I could EVER live in Italy because there are constant restraints on daily life that I don't have when I'm back home in the States. And it makes me sad because so many people who live in America protest against it without knowing that it's a privilege for them to even protest.

What are your thoughts on mental health and how it's portrayed in today's society?

These are really great questions haha. I think mental health needs to be talked about WAAAY more. When I broke up with my ex I don't know what happened, but I have never been the same. I realised soon after that I was and still am very depressed because of him. Some people would say, "get over it". But it's not that simple. The only person that knows is my boyfriend I don't feel comfortable telling them. The world doesn't make it comfortable for us to talk about our mental health.

What are your thoughts on feminism and how it's portrayed in today's society?

When I hear the word feminism, honestly, I run the other way. I really just don't want to hear it anymore. We can literally do anything a man can do, if not better, so I have never seen a reason why we have to complain about being women. Both sexes have their own strengths which God made perfectly to compliment each other so let's use them. I'm not saying that there aren't some issues that need fixing, but do we need to whine to fix them? Let's just get shit done.

What are your thoughts on 'Love is Love' and how it's portrayed in today's society?

I believe love is love and there really shouldn't be anyone to tell anyone differently. I believe in God, but I don't believe he sends anyone to hell for loving the same sex. That's the stupidest thing I've ever head. Who cares what the Bible says about homosexuality, you are a child of God and he loves you as such. That's it.

What advice would you give to someone who is fighting a mental illness?

Talk about it! Don't be afraid to tell your loved ones. And if people respond poorly then you know what, they aren't worth your time. Don't let anyone tell you you're crazy or a psychopath just because they don't understand your situation or reasoning. If they don't understand don't bother explaining, it's not worth it.

What advice would you give to someone who is being bullied or harassed?

If you've been bullied I would just punch back. My brother was bullied when he was young and now he's struggling with mental illness and he has said, "I should have just punched back." What do you have to lose. Same goes for harassment. If someone is harassing you I would take my mothers advice. Her favourite line is, "Fuck off." She says it works every time haha.

If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?

If I could rid the world of one thing it would be the murder of animals. There really is no reason for it. They are so beautiful and they each have their own character and personality why do we need to kill something that could add so much beauty to the world? Are we that weak? Animals and nature is the closest thing we have to God. They are not for eating, they are for learning.

What else do you feel strongly about?

One thing I feel strongly about is waiting to have sex after marriage. Has anyone correlated mental illness/depression/anxiety with premarital sex? Like, it's sooo obvious! I can't possibly be the only one who sees it. And who tells us to wait? Literally no one. Why? Because it's a business.

Let's end this with some fun 'This or That' questions:

Love or money?


Work hard or play hard?

Both! In moderation.

Cups in the cupboard: right side up or upside down?

I say down. You never know what goes in there haha.

Chocolate or sex?

Chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate.

Plan everything or wing it?

I feel like you should plan some things but the greatest memories come from winging it haha.

Happiness or money?

HAPPINESS! No doubt. It's so much rarer than money.

You can follow her on Instagram.

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If you'd like to take part in Bloggers Uncensored please email me at - chroniclesofacreativemess@gmail.com for more info.

There's a new blogger every Sunday at 5pm, see you there!

Love, Han


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